I had hoped to go through March without a single post. I was close too.
He's been silent on Facebook outside of a horrible thing he said about Stoneman Douglas survivor Emma Gonzalez, I chose not to address it fearing the political maelstrom that would follow.
Puppet Steve has been the same shit since he came back from ToyFair. Though there was this one massive 10:25 minute video discussing a toyline called, and I am not kidding, Poopeez. A line of toilet themed toys. I chose not to cover it because I couldn't last a minute without the assistance of hard liquor. Just imagine someone doing a fake annoying laugh after showing every single thing. View at your own risk.
But then, I got a surprise. I have been informed that Chris uploaded something new to "CB Network", formally the Irate Gamer channel. It's not ghost related.
What we get is a minute long video, and despite that it could have been shorter. The first 30 seconds focus entirely on a TV with Super Mario Bros paused on screen. Chris walks by and unpauses the game at the 30 second mark (see what I mean by shorter?) He jumps right into a Bullet Bill, dies, and lets out a cartoonish "DAMN IT". He then throws a pillow at his Samsung TV. Don't do that, that's a nice TV.
Then we get a little montage. Quotes like "You asked for it!" "Rebooted for 2018" "So get ready" and "Coming soon". Through out that we see Chris throwing a Genesis controller, holding a radio (what), and one last shot looking into the camera and saying "We're back baby!" In all his scenes, Chris is wearing these dorky looking neon glasses that glow in the dark. No, those look terrible, you can't be serious. Are you trying to be "80's" again? Even Ernest Cline would tell you to tone it down.
So yeah, Irate Gamer is coming back. Guess Puppet Steve isn't paying the bills anymore. Who knows, Chris never talks about why he does what he does outside of vague notions or outright lies. He'll probably try to do both IG and Puppet Steve, especially since he can basically turn Puppet Steve into a Mad Libs script.
One of the bigger changes is the channel name. It's no longer "CB Network", it's now "CHRIS-TUBE" (in all caps). The channel avatar is Chris in those dumb neon glasses. The channel banner shows the Chris-Tube logo and lists three things under it. "Video Games. Unboxings. Pop Culture". I sense more of the same shit he did when his channel was dying before this...
He also changed his Twitter name. The handle is still "@ChrisBoresIG", but the name is changed to "Chris NEO". So more of the same but with less effort? Just like IG Neo?
Sooooo yeah. Guess I've got more material in the future. I'll be seeing you then. Just don't expect same-day delivery.
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